Tag Archives: responsibility

The Soul of Choice

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You have a choice. You always have a choice.

Get some work done or binge-watch House of Cards? Go out with friends or stay in with your sweetie? Marry the guy or not? Fries or salad?

Do you realize you also have a choice when it comes to your health and well-being?

If the doctor tells you to take a certain medication or the naturopath gives you a list of supplements or your Chinese herbalist tells you to lay off the coffee and sugar, it’s up to you whether or not you do it.

On a certain level, it’s wise to go ahead and follow what they suggest. You’ve gone to whichever practitioner for help, so you do as they ask, trusting their expertise. It’s what you were seeking in the first place.

What’s not so great is if you’re following any of those suggestions blindly, without understanding what it’s for. (Yes, I do know people who pop pills daily because the doctor told them to, yet have no idea why.) It’s a bad idea to give all your power to the health care provider.

Then again, maybe that can be to your advantage, so you have someone to blame if things don’t work out as you’d expected. (She said in a snarky tone.)

You have a choice.

It’s your right.

It’s your responsibility.

When you follow suggestions and prescriptions blindly, you’re handing over more than your power; you’re giving away all responsibility for your own body and health.

The doctor, the naturopath, the Chinese practitioner is there to gather information and provide solutions according to what they know. All they can do is offer the help. I see myself as the lamplighter, illuminating a certain path. It’s up to you to take the steps, to follow the path…or not.

Responsibility in this sense means:

  • be honest with yourself that you need professional help in the first place;
  • be honest with your practitioner(s), giving them the whole picture and allowing them to support you as thoroughly as possible;
  • ask questions if you don’t understand either what’s happening, the suggestions/prescriptions you’ve been given, or what you can expect from the substance or lifestyle shift – both good and bad.

If, for whatever reason, what’s been offered doesn’t sit right with you, it’s your responsibility to take time, to gather more information, to ask for modifications or a 2nd opinion.

However, I’ll say it again, you must take responsibility for your choices.

This train of thought brings to mind The Lovers card from the Tarot.

Picture a man and a woman, naked, and on the verge of that first kiss, with all the delicious tension and possibility in that moment. The potency is so ripe, entire books have been written about it – what happens if they kiss? What happens if they don’t? (The Post-Birthday World by Lionel Shriver is a must-read if you’re into that sort of thing.)

This is Adam & Eve about to bite into the apple. No matter what you decide, there are consequences. Some good, some bad. Stay in the state you’re in now, or dare to face the unknown world of something that could be either dangerous or liberating? Regardless of the choice you make, you must take responsibility for what happens next.

This card also reminds you that “getting naked” – dropping fully into your body with pure openness, even vulnerability – will clarify your decisions.

In the long, slow process of moving to another city, my husband and I have been learning all we can about the different neighbourhoods and making lists of what we want in a house. Then we cull the internet for places in our price-range that tick as many of the boxes we’ve made a priority, like a big backyard with trees and a finished basement.

On our list, we’ve also written down how we want to feel in our new home. Spacious, warm, welcome. It’s not until we actually go and drive around the areas, walk through the houses and “get the vibe” that we know for sure if a place is right for us or not. We need to feel it.

It’s the same with health decisions.

Yes, it starts with an informed decision, as described above. At a certain point, though, you need to turn off your head and connect to how it feels in your body.

Maybe a certain supplement gives you a headache, or the thought of going straight for high-tech meds intuitively feels too extreme for the time-being. Maybe the prospect of giving up sugar brings up fear or anger.

It’s possible that you need more information. It’s possible that you need support addressing the emotional reaction. Maybe your body is telling you something that doesn’t come across logically.

Noticing and addressing those sensations is a part of responsible choice.

OK, so you’ve made your decisions: you’re taking the pills and steering clear of the caffeine, but what happens if you slip up?

I could write a whole other post about this one, but let me make one thing clear:

Cheating is a choice.

Drinking a cup of coffee, eating a chocolate doughnut or kissing your boss: none of these things “just happen”. Perhaps fleeting and lost in a whirlwind of emotion and desire, but that moment of “Do or not do” is there.

The power of the moment, and your ability to make a wise choice, lies in doing so consciously. Understand that you are responsible for the consequences and the choices that come afterwards.

Is it one coffee, one doughnut or one kiss – savoured and enjoyed for all it’s worth? Or do you allow your efforts to backslide into a full affair with whichever substance has tempted you?

It gets back to how you want to feel in your body, even decide who you want to be, and determine if the belly ache you’ll have later is worth the 30 seconds of sweet in your mouth now.

At some point, my husband and I will have to stop flirting with ideas and make an offer on one particular house. Once you’ve thought about the options, you’ve got to pick which one(s) you’ll follow to improve your health.

The magic of choice lies in the commitment to what you’ve chosen. Follow your choice with your whole heart, and watch as healing and your life unfold before you.

What choices do you make on a daily basis for the good of your health, body and soul? When you share in the comments, you open the possibilities for others.

Make a wise choice today, and share this post with your friends by clicking any (or all!) of the buttons below.

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Featured image: Vi – The Lovers. Morgan-Greer Tarot

The Power of the C-Word

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In the spring a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love. *

You can feel it in the heat of the sun, see it in the buds on the trees, hear it in the excited chirping every morning. There’s a charge in the very air. And those thoughts of love soon turn to something more…

That’s right. I’m talking about Commitment.

Now, here’s a word that gets bandied about so much lately, it’s kind of losing its edge. We lose the weight of it, the implications of saying it. We’ve forgotten its power.

A few weeks ago I was at a friend’s wedding. Listening to the words of the celebrant and hearing the vows, drew me back to my own experience of those vows. I reassess what we said at our wedding and ponder how we’ve gained strength (or strayed) from them.

The purpose of marriage, of publicly declaring your commitment to another, is that it provides a container in which to pour your relationship. It’s the safe space where you can sift the good from the bad. It’s the bucket of mortar from which you can start to lay the foundation for the relationship.

commitment bowlAnd this isn’t exclusive to marriage. The idea holds true for any relationship – personal or business, internal or external.

So here I am, weeks later, pondering all sorts of commitments in my life.

It was about a year ago that I made the commitment to show up in this blog every 2nd week to share thoughts, insights and practical advice with my clients & followers. (It took until July to get the actual ball rolling, but the intention was in place last April.)

It’s been remarkable to witness that decision coming into fruition. Despite fears that I’d get tired of it, or the occasional bout of writer’s block, I’ve managed to follow through. Sometimes the results are better than others, but I can feel my own comfort & dedication to both the craft and my audience blossoming with time & effort.

The commitment has been the glue that’s held my decision in place.

Unwavering.

Now there’s a word that always makes me think of my heart. It’s been beating (non-stop!) since 8 months before I was even born…and it’ll continue as long as I do. That amount of dedication fills me with unsettling amounts of awe. I’m completely undone by the idea that the Life Force is driving that action for me.

To go even deeper, a commitment by my spirit to incarnate sparked the driving force of my entire existence. The decision is made, the wheels set in motion, and there’s nothing to do but follow the ride to its completion.

It’s when I think of that steadfast gesture, by my soul and the Universe together, on my behalf, that I understand my own responsibility within that commitment.

I’ve been talking a lot recently about self-love, about self-care as a daily expression of that love. As for any beloved, it’s daily action that solidifies the foundation on which the relationship grows.

I commit to my own self-care & health as necessary to carrying through the intentions my soul has laid out for me in this life.

I’m getting kind of heavy here – are you still with me?

Let me put it another way:

When you take the time & effort to look after your health, you allow the best manifestation of your Self to shine. You afford yourself the strength  & energy to show up fully for your family, your work, your community, your environment.

You’re able to live the most enriched version of your life.

Because that’s the ultimate aim, commitment is one of the first things I require from my clients. I’m working on a contract they’ll sign, but for now, it simply takes the form of payment in advance.

Paying money is a concrete way of saying, “I’m all in!”

This (or any) type of pledge makes a statement to both the psyche and the Universe, so that they can align with your objective, and start working towards the picture of better health you hold.

Making that commitment means there’s a greater chance you’ll follow through.

It’s like when you take a course. You pay your tuition and get ready to work. And sure, who the teacher is will have a certain influence on your success, however, we all learned through high school and college that you get out what you put in.

Your chances of a satisfying experience are greater when you show up, fully present, to the lectures, when you read the required materials, when you apply yourself wholeheartedly to the assignments.

Same with your health. I’m merely a guide. Your chances of improving your health & well-being depend on how present and engaged you are to the process.

Which gets me to one last, but oh-so-important piece:

Commitment is NOT synonymous with perfection.

Like marriage, like school, like any part of life really, there’ll be good days and there’ll be days when you just want to pack it all in and say “F&#* It!”

Like marriage & school, the bad days provide the room for growth. Mistakes show us where we need to learn. Improving your health also requires compassion, kindness and forgiveness as much as any relationship or endeavour.

The commitment keeps you tethered to the path.

blossom path

Back to the charged energy of Spring.

In the spirit of renewal, I’m ready to bolster the walls in my own life by openly stating:

I am committed to stepping up my own self-care with a deep homeopathic detox.

I have a feeling it’ll be a challenge on many levels, but the delicious promise of what it offers on the other side stands taller in my mind’s eye than a few weeks of discomfort.

Your turn! WHAT ARE YOU READY TO COMMIT TO THIS SEASON?
When you share in the comments, you open the possibilities for others.

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* from Locksley Hall by Alfred Tennyson